HEALING HER HURT: Detroit native Robin Stone's new book breaks the silence about sexual assault within black families (cont.)
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Althea Grant, a social worker who directs the Rape Crisis Center of the Detroit Police Department, says about two-thirds of the reported incidents involve children up to age 15. Among children up to age 12, the perpetrator is more than likely a family member or someone else the child knows, such as a baby-sitter or friend of the family.
"A lot of cases come to our attention because the school calls," Grant says.
"It's so important that children tell somebody. So often they feel ashamed, but they have to understand it's not their fault," Grant says.
Perpetrators need help, too
By not reporting or telling on perpetrators children
free them to commit the same crime again.
"Silence enables an abuser to move from one child to another," Stone says.
Grant says she agrees there was a time when African Americans were reluctant to report the crime of sexual abuse, but she says that is no longer as common.
"I work primarily with African Americans, and they do call us now," she says.
Grant adds that the number of reported cases of sexual assaults is down significantly -- from about 50-60 a month a few years ago to maybe 20 a month now.
Stone says it's important for families to understand that refusing to validate a child's story doesn't help the family in the long run.
"If anybody is hurt in the family, it affects everybody," she says. Silence doesn't help perpetrators either, she says. The way to help that person is to get them into a system where they can be helped. "It's a crime that stems from mental disorder," she says. "Families think: 'We'll take care of it ourselves.' But there are people trained to respond who know the right way to help the whole family," Stone says. "People who are not trained could re-traumatize a child by the kinds of questions you ask or don't ask or the way you ask them.
It's important not to close ranks, but to find help."